Parenting that Matters
My 16 year old son and I enjoyed lunch together on Wednesday. He and I have been trying to eat lunch together at least once a week recently. With school starting today, the opportunity diminishes drastically.
The purpose of our lunch was to talk, once again, about the expectations his mother and I have for him. I share a brief summary of these expectations with you thinking it might be a source of encouragement for some of our parents.
EXPECTATION #1: We expect you to grow in your devotion to the Lord.
That growth includes reading his Bible, communicating daily with the Lord, memorizing Scripture, sharing his faith and submitting to the Lord’s will for his life.
EXPECTATION #2: We expect you to remain committed to the kingdom of God through CrossPoint.
That commitment includes participating in his weekly Bible study class, tithing every dollar he earns, worshiping regularly and fellowshipping with other believers.
EXPECTATION #3: We expect you to remain pure in your dating relationships.
Taylor and I have had this conversation countless times. I have instructed him that he should treat each date as a potential mate. Then I remind him that he should treat that date the same way he wants his future wife to be treated. That also includes being a gentleman every time he takes a girl out on a date.
EXPECTATION #4: We expect you to be a good example for Christ.
That example includes having the same attitude and approach to life that we believe Christ would show. We expect him not to smoke or drink or cuss or lie or gamble or cheat or steal or do anything else that impugns the name of Christ. That example also includes hanging out with people who are trying to be the same kind of example.
EXPECTATION #5: We expect you to do your best.
At school that includes arriving on time, studying appropriately for each class, completing assignments, being courteous and making the kind of grades we know he is capable of making. With regard to his lawn care business, that includes finishing each task he is being paid to complete and leaving the yard in better shape than when he arrived.
EXEPECTATION # 6: We expect you to remain connected to your family.
Part of growing up includes growing apart from your parents. We understand that Taylor is now at the stage of development when he wants to spread his wings and fly on his own. We realize that is a normal part of maturing. However, we also want Taylor to set aside time to spend with us as a family.
Our commitment to Taylor in fulfilling these expectations is very simple. If he fulfills these prospects, then his mother and I will do everything within our power, resources and ability to help matriculate through college and establish himself as an adult.
These expectations are high; we know that. But Vonda and I have learned that we would rather challenge our children to rise up to being what God wants them to be than to stoop down to what the enemy would like for them to become.
The purpose of our lunch was to talk, once again, about the expectations his mother and I have for him. I share a brief summary of these expectations with you thinking it might be a source of encouragement for some of our parents.
EXPECTATION #1: We expect you to grow in your devotion to the Lord.
That growth includes reading his Bible, communicating daily with the Lord, memorizing Scripture, sharing his faith and submitting to the Lord’s will for his life.
EXPECTATION #2: We expect you to remain committed to the kingdom of God through CrossPoint.
That commitment includes participating in his weekly Bible study class, tithing every dollar he earns, worshiping regularly and fellowshipping with other believers.
EXPECTATION #3: We expect you to remain pure in your dating relationships.
Taylor and I have had this conversation countless times. I have instructed him that he should treat each date as a potential mate. Then I remind him that he should treat that date the same way he wants his future wife to be treated. That also includes being a gentleman every time he takes a girl out on a date.
EXPECTATION #4: We expect you to be a good example for Christ.
That example includes having the same attitude and approach to life that we believe Christ would show. We expect him not to smoke or drink or cuss or lie or gamble or cheat or steal or do anything else that impugns the name of Christ. That example also includes hanging out with people who are trying to be the same kind of example.
EXPECTATION #5: We expect you to do your best.
At school that includes arriving on time, studying appropriately for each class, completing assignments, being courteous and making the kind of grades we know he is capable of making. With regard to his lawn care business, that includes finishing each task he is being paid to complete and leaving the yard in better shape than when he arrived.
EXEPECTATION # 6: We expect you to remain connected to your family.
Part of growing up includes growing apart from your parents. We understand that Taylor is now at the stage of development when he wants to spread his wings and fly on his own. We realize that is a normal part of maturing. However, we also want Taylor to set aside time to spend with us as a family.
Our commitment to Taylor in fulfilling these expectations is very simple. If he fulfills these prospects, then his mother and I will do everything within our power, resources and ability to help matriculate through college and establish himself as an adult.
These expectations are high; we know that. But Vonda and I have learned that we would rather challenge our children to rise up to being what God wants them to be than to stoop down to what the enemy would like for them to become.
2 comments:
This is great info. Our childen need to know what we expect of them. If we don't tell them what we expect, they will hear the wrong messages from tv and their peers. Taylor will do great. He has his church family behind him too. Gay
AMEN!! First, let me commend you for taking the time with your teens. To talk and also to LISTEN to them. I hope more parents will follow suite and do the same as you and Vonda are doing. Having certain expectations and telling him what they are and also living it in front of them is the only way to raise good kids these days. Keep them close as you turn them loose!
Taylor seems like a very good young man to me . I know you have the same expectations of Kelsey.
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